How to END Bad Communication Forever!

Did you know that bad communication is the 2nd most common cause for divorce? If your spouse were to say to you right now, “Honey we need to talk!” Would you be happy to talk or would fear come upon you?

 

And as a result of this fear, a simple, “Honey we need to talk!” turns into a BIG argument. What are you going to do to improve this?

 

For most married couples… and this is really sad, but it’s true… their odds of becoming an excellent communicator are about as good as their odds of finding a four-leaf clover… in the Gobi desert!

 

No, not for lack of trying…

 

 

 

… but for lack of knowing.

 

 

 

You can TRY to become an excellent communicator all day long… you can hope your spouse “gets you,” you can take a course on communication, and you can pray until you’re blue in the face…

 

… but until there’s some method to your madness, you’re just nailing jello to the wall.

 

So in the spirit of knowledge which *actually* leads to success in this area…

 

Here are 3 of my top tips to quickly improve communication with your spouse:

 

 

 

Your TONE matters at ALL times. The tone in which you communicate can determine if an argument may arise. A good proverb I always like to share is “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Prov. 15:1).

 

CHECK and adjust your non-verbal behavior. Did you know that “nonverbal communication accounts for 58 percent of the total message? Tone of voice makes up 35 percent of the message. The actual words you say account for only 7 percent of the total message.” This area causes many problems in marriages because one partner may say “yes” with a tone that says “no.” 

 

NEVER interrupt your spouse.  Proverbs 18:13 states, “To answer before listening— that is folly and shame.” Interrupting your spouse in the middle of a statement will almost always create conflicts. A reminder of James is very helpful here, “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19).

… hopefully that’s helpful!

 

If you master the art of checking and adjusting your tone, your non-verbals, listening without interrupting and intentionally gently answering your spouse, I guarantee you will improve communication with your spouse. So, the next time your spouse says, “Honey, we need to talk,” purpose in your heart to gently answer your spouse with these words, “Honey, let’s choose a time when we can talk.” The results will be remarkable.

 

If you have found this information helpful, share this with someone. If you are ready to take your communication to the next level, apply these strategies today. If you would like the step by step guides, templates, and vast amounts of other strategies to enrich your communication and your marriage, check out my brand-new Total Marriage Transformation Online Course today. Your marriage will never be the same.