The Apology that Counts!

How do you know if you are sincere in your apology? Have you ever said, “I’m sorry,” only to see the same pattern of behaviors resurface? Are you fed up with this negative cycle? If so, you need to understand the “Apology that Counts.”

It is important to apologize when necessary. However, the apology that counts should not be manipulated. It should come from a place of understanding accountability. Accountability is when you are taking full responsibility for the negative behavior.

Apologizing is an important part for resolving issues in marriage. For Christians, an apology should mean more than, “I’m sorry.” It should come from deep within your heart from conviction.

The Bibles teaches, “Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation without regret, but worldly sorrow brings death” (2 Cor 7:10). Godly sorrow is guilt over sin (offending and hurting God), which leads to repentance. Repentance is saying, “I was wrong to God. If I could do it all over again, I would do it God’s way.” it is with this attitude, you can then apologize to you spouse.

Worldly sorrow, on the other hand,  is focused on, “Me, Me, Me and I, I, I.” It is a sense of feeling guilty because you got caught. You say things like, “If I could go back in time, I would have done this, this, this differently so that I wouldn’t have gotten caught.” This attitude leads to the type of apology that “Does Not” Count, which then leads to a destructive recurring pattern of bad behaviors. The only way to be victorious over any sinful behavior is through Godly sorrow, which then produces the, “Apology that Counts.”

Dr. Delroy Fredericks

May your relationships be blessed.

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